Relationship advice that pertains to romance typically ranges from the superficial to the silly, in many self-help books and magazines. This shallow quality of romantic relationship advice may be a reflection of the dearth of romance in so many marriages, particularly those with children.
Relationship advice for a deeper romantic bond is not critical. You won't die without romance, if by life you mean only the active heartbeat that can be sustained through artificial, mechanical means. Romance is not essential to survival like air, water, food, sleep and exercise, but it is necessary for complete matrimonial delight and for the total love of life.
Real romantic relationship advice is extremely practical because when romance is in full bloom, we feel happier and more hopeful, which promotes good health. We also express more inspiration and motivation, helping us to perform at higher levels in all departments of life, including work and parenting.
Relationship advice, to be thorough, needs to address each of the following because each releases the potential for romance when it works and blocks romantic feelings when it breaks down:
- Friendship (having fun together)
- Efficient, practical teamwork
- Constructive and compassionate communication
- Accepting the risk of loss or betrayal
- Giving one another space for individual regrouping
- Understanding and forgiving the occasional flare up of
tempers from passion
- Each individual's generally optimistic attitude toward life
- Honoring one's own need to live in a natural, authentic way
Perhaps the most important romantic relationship advice is this: You cannot force romance. Being unnatural is actually a cause of romantic dissipation.
If your relationship seems to lack romance, you will no doubt find that one or more of the above areas are not working well. Follow this piece of relationship advice to begin improving things: Don't complain or blame. Simply bring more awareness into your daily interactions with your mate. Just pay closer attention to discover ways that you cause or contribute to the breakdowns, and opportunities for improvement or repair. Following this relationship advice will gradually lead you into more romantic joy and marital fulfillment, to the extent that your mate is open to that happening.